Kathleen Reynolds hid a dark secret her entire high school life. She wanted to be a cool kid, so she buried it down deep so no one could see it. But I’ve seen the pictures, and they are amazing. She actually wore glasses as a kid. Honest-to-God reading glasses. Her eyes didn’t accept the corrective treatments back then. And she used them to read actual paperbound books. Here’s the kicker. They weren’t romances. She thought those were stupid. What she loved to read were tales of daring and adventure in the outer reaches of space. With big A Aliens. She even had an “I Want To Believe” t-shirt. No joke. I’ve seen the picture. Glasses. Book. And t-shirt. She was a real science fiction geek, in an age where most people had stopped believing we were ever going to find anyone out there. She believed there was someone out there and she wanted to meet them.
Girls are complicated. I know that, but Kathleen Reynolds took complications to a whole extra level. There was always the bouncing cheerleader in her. And there was the hard-bitten starfighter pilot and squadron commander as well. But there was something else she buried real deep and it was the real reason she joined us at Alpha Centauri. She didn’t tell me for years, but when she did it brought so much of her into sense. She had a dark secret, you see, one that had haunted her childhood until she buried it deep in a closet for no one to see. Looking back on it, it explains why we got along together so well, right from the start. I guess she felt safe with me. She thought I would accept her for who she really was. I guess I did, and when she told me, I found out why. We were interested in the same things, you see, even if our reasons were different.
The Marines would have been happy to shift Kathleen Reynolds over to us at her full rank so she could take over, but the President wanted us as we were, so she asked Katy to take a courtesy demotion to the rank of captain. Katy agreed, because when the President asks you for a favor, you do that thing she wants and get a card you can turn in in the future. Katy then proceeded to give us five decades worth of tips and training to help us bone up on starfighter tactics. It was veterans like Katy who honed us into the superior combat unit that everybody recognizes as the Cowboys. We were good before we got her, you understand. She and the others just made us far greater, and I was happy to fly with her on my wing. I used to say we were lucky to have gotten her, but I realized later that luck had nothing to do with it in time. Katy picked us for her own reasons. She kept those reasons to herself for a long time.
Mom’s cancer was worse in the past. It was eating her alive before she started retaking cancer drugs. She lost something like 50 pounds in less than a month. The cancer meds stopped that. They may not have been able to halt the cancer totally while at half strength, but they did help her body stabilize the situation. The swelling in her legs has gone down again, and she can read and pay attention to TV shows again. The pain is gone. In every way that matters, her symptoms are better today than they were a couple months ago. But the cancer has still been spreading. That is why we have returned the cancer meds to full strength. We know they CAN kill the cancer. Hopefully they will. The problem is that they can hurt her heart. So she is taking meds to strengthen her heart. Please pray that her heart can handle the strength of the drugs required to kill the cancer.
Mom’s cancer was beaten back in the brain, but the definitive tests of yesterday showed us that it has continued to grow in her body. After a brief meeting with her doctor, and after looking at multiple options for the road ahead, we decided that the best route forward was to return her cancer meds to full dosage and hope they will fight off the cancer again as they did before. The cancer will almost certainly kill Mom in time. But if it responds to these drugs as it did last time at this dosage, and if Mom’s heart can handle the meds, she could live for years into the future. If it does not respond, or if her heart has problems with the meds, years are no longer in the foreseeable future.
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