Jack of Harts

When the Peloran made Contact, they passed by a hundred lightyears of scout ships and thirty lightyears of colonies to reveal themselves inside our own native star system. And when the quick-thinking British captain invited the Peloran over for tea, the Peloran answered, “we would not have come all this way for excretal Yank coffee.” That answered two questions. “Do aliens understand fart jokes?” And “would they watch us long enough to recognize our divergent cultures before making Contact?” They have never answered the third question. “How long have they been watching us?”