I have been a major fan of Star Wars since I was young. I first watched the movies in the early 80s, not long after Jedi came out. I had a friend who loved them and I watched the movies with him first. Thus a lifelong love set hold. I liked the way Star Wars was told. It was light and fun, with the diverse alliance of good guys at war with the evil space nazis, trying to rebuild and restore the Republic to the galaxy. That was Star Wars then, when I was young, built on hope and dreams, and I loved it. I still do, and I always will.

A few years later, Bantam Books began putting out new official Star Wars books, and the further adventures of Luke Skywalker and his friends pulled me back into Star Wars. Most of the books were similar to the movies. The diverse alliance of good guys had a handful of people who remembered the good old days, before the Dark Times, before The Empire, but most of the heroes were wise cracking youths who had grown up under the Imperial boot. They fought, they won, or they lost, but at the end of each story there was some win. Big or small, each story ended on a positive note.

The Empire had fallen to the control of individual governors and Moffs who sought to be new Emperors, but no one could beat everyone else in that game. Skywalker and his friends met new allies and enemies, declared the creation of the New Republic and made the Old Republic Senator Mon Mothma their first President. They spent years of work fighting to conquer Coruscant from the weakened Empire and make the New Republic a reality, and much of that was due to her leadership. She carried much prestige, and the galaxy flocked to her banner to rebuild what was lost. A true New Republic that could replace the Empire that had brought them low.

Unless the story of the day was that the Empire was rising and then the New Republic was fighting to survive. Admiral Thrawn returned from wild space to unite all the Imperial factions under one banner and threatened the New Republic before he was killed. Luke met Mara Jade, a Hand of the Emperor ordered to kill Luke by the literal last force command of the Emperor sent as he was falling towards the Death Star core. But they fought at each other’s sides more often than not as she fought to keep that last command from controlling her destiny. The reformed Empire was still strong, with thousands of systems still under their control, and they succeeded in pushing the New Republic off Coruscant again. They had spent a generation solidifying their power, and they would not fall in a mere handful of months or years.

But then the knives came out once more and the governors and Moffs returned to squabling over who would be the new Emperor again. Which is when the New Republic retook Coruscant again. And this time they HELD it. President Mon Mothma and then President Leia Organa-Solo spent decades rebuilding the New Republic, and whenever a crises rose, it was Leia and Han and Luke or other diverse good guys who went off to deal with the issue and save the future of the Republic once again. They were rather hands on, and the Millenium Falcon became the effective Chief’s Executive Vehicle. Wherever it went, people knew things were going down.

Luke meanwhile built a new Jedi Academy and began training new Jedi. Some did well, some died, and some did Very Badly. But the New Jedi Order survived and expanded, embodied most by Han and Leia’s three children. A new generation of Jedi, supported by a handful of old Jedi who survived the end of the Old Republic by hiding better than anybody guessed, spread out and slowly brought truth, justice, and the Republic way back to the galaxy.

Then Thrawn came back again, and threatened the New Republic once more. Luke and Mara went out to discover what was up, found Thrawn, and ended his threat by working together once more. At which time, the Imperial Remnant and the New Republic agreed to peace talks and a final end to the long Galactic Civil War. And in a nice little ceremony to round out the Bantam era of Star Wars, Luke and Mara got married in a story written by Bantam authors and drawn by Dark Horse comics IIRC. It was a good story. Star Wars back then was all about the good guys winning in the end and having a nice life. I liked those stories.

Around the same time, Lucas used the profits and interest in Star Wars generated by LucasArts games and the licensed books to make his prequel trilogy, in which heroic Jedi fought against the fall of the Republic even as the Sith conspired against them. And the original Clone Wars series made to connect Episodes II and III was a delightful romp through the war showing the Jedi and the Clones and their diverse alliance of Big Damn Heroes fighting together for truth, justice, and the Republic way. Sometimes they lost. Sometimes they won, but every character got crowning moments of awesome and snark, both good and bad. It was fun and felt like Star Wars to me. It had the heart of Star Wars in it. And even as Episode III closed out with the fall of the Republic and the Jedi Order, they still showed us the rising resistance that would form the Rebel Alliance in the future. It showed us a hope for the future, even as the past fell into ruins.

When Del Rey took over the book publishing of Stars, their Star Wars universe was less hopeful. Less bright. The books didn’t end with great victories. It was one loss after another, major characters died, or turned evil, and marriages collapsed. And the New Republic fell to an extra-galactic invasion of truly inhuman evil. It was a Dark Time, and I stopped reading the books. They didn’t feel like Star Wars to me. They wore its clothing, but lacked its heart. I no longer cared, and simply stopped paying any attention to it.

I was hopeful that Disney, a company known for making bright and hopeful movies, would do well with Star Wars when they bought it. And they did moderately well with the first of their sequels. Oh, I had some serious trouble reconciling everything I knew about Star Wars with their vision of it, but I was willing to watch it. Even if I didn’t like their universe nearly as much as the original Star Wars universe. It certainly wasn’t as nice. They broke up the one of the greatest romances in film history for one! Made Han a grouchy old man, and Leia into a general who had never been President of the galaxy. Took away Han and Leia’s three children and replaced them with one brat wearing the name of Luke’s son!

Then the Last Jedi came out, and they turned Luke Skywalker into a bitter old hermit who gave up on the galaxy, and I was out. Done. Finished. Put a stick in me. I would later watch the third sequel and liked it moderately well, but I don’t CARE about it. It wore the Star Wars clothing, but the heart wasn’t there. I’ve watched some of their other stuff since. Some of it had the heart of Star Wars in it, most has not. Solo was fun, but Rogue One made me depressed all over again. Ditto with Andor. The Mandalorian was a fun romp, while Boba Fett made me struggle to care about the namesake character.

And then there is the new Clone Wars that goes on a lot longer than any of these series or movies. Six seasons I think in all. And it is not hopeful. In fact, it shows a version of the Star Wars universe in which the Jedi are a fallen order, losing touch with their old ways, and falling into ignorance and apathy. The Jedi Order portrayed in this series is practically begging to be put out to pasture and shot in the head, much like the Old Republic itself. They are losing their way, and even some of the Jedi are going dark, turning to the Dark Side as the Jedi lose their connection with the people.

And I have finally realized something. We don’t see enough snarky and hopeful people wise cracking as they fight the bad guys now. I can’t find the hope and brightness that Star Wars was built on now. I simply don’t like the Star Wars universe of now. Not how it is shown to us. Not how it is built. Not anything about it, really. It is by and large, not the hopeful children’s stories of glorious heroes fighting the bad guys that it was back then, when I was young. The Star Wars of now wears the clothing, but it lacks the heart. I simply do not like the new building blocks of the Disney version of Star Wars. The same way I felt about Del Rey’s version of Star Wars. Yes, they may make some stuff that I like, such as the Mandalorian, but that is built on blocks that are a frail stand indeed next to the Star Wars that I grew up with.

I still have Star Wars, I still love it, and I will continue to love it. But it is Star Wars of then, when I was young. It is the movies and the books that I grew up with. It is the Luke Skywalker who is the protector who never stopped fighting to stand for what was good and right.

This is the Star Wars I love.